I finally realised i am not looking for a guy who can fill my empty heart with superficial love.
But, rather, i searching for a brother who can lead me.
A brother who is a good example for me to follow.
A brother who can protect me.
A brother who can shower me with 'brotherly love'.
A brother who is christ-like.

Am i suppose to find that brother in Jesus?
Or does that person with such character really exist?

Oh God, its such a struggle.
It feels like the world is collapsing on me.
Studying for Olevels is hell of a struggle!
especially for me, since my L1R5 is like 27.
yea shocking....
and another struggle only God u know.

well the 1 year deal is left with another 5 more months.
i thought i got over you, but its harder then i thought.
And this few months, i realised how unprepared i am for another r/s.
oh God, fill me with your love.
for only your love can fill me up fully.

May God bless all who are taking their Olevels this year.
To God be gloried!

I can conquer my Mt Everest because i have an ever living God.

"Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong."

just a thought,
every Human Being makes mistakes.
sometimes these mistakes hurt others deeply,
til a point they become so numb they cant accept 'sorry' anymore.

Well, to all those people i hurt you with my words, action, accusation and impossible expectation for you to live up. I'm sorry.
this 5 letter word may seem very small,
but it is a powerful word to use.
And i really mean what i say.
i really want to reconcile with you and ask for your forgiveness.
for without forgiveness,
we will unknowingly bear hatred on each other.

During FOP,
i commmited my life back to JESUS
and God told me,
to have joy within me,
i must reconcile back with others.
i need to change my life that i will be a mirror that has reflection of Jesus.

the temptation that overwhelms our heart
hiding our deadly sins
pretending its all alright
how far will temptation bring you?
how far will you go to give your heart, just to feel 'emotion' again?
are we all ready to submit this, short term pleasure?
the grey line of love or sin is impossible to tell
where do we stop before its all too late?
before we get addicted?
is there such thing as point of no return
or is it just an excuse to cover for our 'love'
enlighten me,
what is Love?

sometimes i wish i never did tell u how i felt.
how stupid to regret.
stay strong bel, another 6 more months and u never have to see 'them' again...

Chinese O's im traumatise by it...
i really wanna pass:(

Meridian JC lah.

But if you like, MJC can be mangkali jc, majesty' jc, Majulah jc, Merlion JC also

can lah.

By the way, my primary school is Pulau Ubin Primary School, my secondary school is Pulau Tekong Secondary School, my junior college is Sentosa Junior College and my university is Merlion University and my professor is Professor Sang Nila Utama.

oh man this guy is super funny!!!
haha
i was checking out which jc i should try out for mjc or sajc and i came across this.
super funny!

anyway
i love sajc because:
1)nearer
2)uniform
3)sporty boys who play rugby:)
4)retain rate lower than mjc
5)christian school
6)their dance is better than meridian

i love mjc because:
1)more distinctions in their subjects as compared to sajc
2)value added school
3)their a young school but cca is not too bad either
4)their not like nyjc with crazy chinese speaking ppl.:)

also, im in love with acjc as well because:
1)their sports = fantastic!
2)hot boys>??? not so sure, ha
3)humanities elective programme!
4)their COP is comparable to AJC which is known to be a not bad school

however, they have 3 bad points too sad to say:
1)dont focus on their aesthetics cca like dance
2)rich kids school
3)too far from my home.

oh wells, im considering other jcs too other than these few like:
cjc(love the dance and ccas there, hate their pe curriculum )
nyjc(good in volleyball but mostly chinese speaking ppl and not so sure they do well in GP)
rjc(i dont even wanna think of their school. ha too hard to get in unless i use dsa but what are the chances? 0.000000001%?)
srjc(not too bad either, good in dance, 15mins walk from home...)
tjc/vjc(just considering these 2 schools but i doubt i will be able to survive there as well. i prefer vjc more though. vjc is a cool jc!:))

the other jcs i dont like or its too far so left these few.

perhaps poly is my calling?(i love the design and humanities courses offered. maybe i should join my sister in business course? but i also want something related to the arts, the theatre... theatre studies???? is there such course? so confuse)
or sota or nafa?(hard life and there is no turning back once i set my foot on these schools)
overseas education that major in dance and studies as well???(no money no talk:()

KATHRYN DANCING ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!
SHE'S AWESOME!!!
HER DANCING IS INDESCIRABLE!!!

im learning her solo for my dsa...
praying hard the jcs/dance schools would give me a second chance and not regect my application immediately when they see my horrifying results:/

Oh God, only you know whats best for me.
you are the one who decides my path.
so please tell me, where do u wanna me to go?

im still not sure whether to drop chemistry or continue with pure science or combined science...
i seriously dislike chemistry and i love physics!
im weird...

sigh my results,
ha well it sucks.
L1R5: 27=GG
will there be a miracle in my results lord?
i wanna make a change!!!!!!!!
but its so hard.:(

this would probably be my last few post as im gonna disconnect my computer by june to copncentrate on Olevel.

i freaking hate Olevel!
because of Olevel, i cant partcipate in YOG as a performer!!!!!
hate O's!!!!!
argh!!!